Friday, October 15, 2010

My Awakening...

I am currently going through an AWAKENING, and I'm entering a higher level of consciousness. We all have the capacity to reach this level, but we have to be open to it. We have to rid our lives of the constant clutter that life seems to fill our minds and body with. What I find to be one of the most interesting aspects of this spiritual AWAKENING is that a majority of it seemed to just happen, and although I was conscious of it, and I made my own decisions to get to where I am today, I seemed to have been on automatic pilot. It seems like all of this had been discussed before, and I just knew what I was supposed to do...up until this very moment right now. Everything has seemed almost scripted, and now I'm seeking advice and knowledge, and an enlightenment so that I will be able to finish what I've started and continue until I've reached Christ's Consciousness.

God has blessed me with so many gifts and abilities that so far have helped me to discover gifts and abilities that once had felt like a burden and a punishment. There have been so many things happening to me that are literally "just happening". It seems they happen in spurts, but most likely these happenings are more gradual happenings with bursts of more noticeable things in the midst.

After, I began seeing my counselor for therapy because of my medical problems, because we had moved to the Atlanta area, and I was beginning to see all new doctors, and I knew no one here. It was just my husband and myself, and I was overwhelmed! Suzanne was wonderful! She was exactly what I needed. She is just as liberal and eccentric as I so that works out good for me. She makes me feel very comfortable, which is important when you are specifically seeing a health care worker to talk to and with about things that are bothering you or trying to pinpoint things in your past or present that are possibly causing issues that are bringing with them pain, frustration, sadness, anxiety, or stress. I felt so comfortable with her, that not only did I talk about personal issues with family and friends and my health issues that were causing me the most stress at the time, I also decided to go ahead and hit her with some other issues that have been affecting me--that were a huge part of me and my life...

When I got the courage up, I told her about my history. I said, "Suzanne, ever since I was a child I have had some unusual, unexplainable experiences." Well, once she told me to go on and to explain...I never shut up! I told her about how I have always had problems with magnetic and electrical energy. I said that I have been blowing up electrical appliances, etc. for years. I can't wear watches because after a short time, they begin to go backward and then STOP! I have actually brought back 15 to 20 watches to have the batteries replaced only to have them all stop running in less than a month. I blow out light bulbs and blow UP light bulbs, have blown up televisions, mixers, a desk computer, a laptop, the reading lights above the airplane seats--two out of the three in a three-seat section, my brother's brand new car's complete electrical system--seat warmers, windshield wipers, all the computerized light system, and finally, the engine shut down because the entire computer system stopped working--, an oven burned up and caught fire, our air conditioning unit, the radio in our car, several digital alarm clocks, my cell phone, our cable in the living room, rechargeable flashlights, my husband's clock in his car, street lights would turn off as I walk by, the light in the freezer/refrigerated section turns off when I touch the door to open it at the supermarket, the garage door opener, and the biggest electrical involvement was during an argument with my hubby when our entire apartment's electricity went out AND the entire apartment below us! It came back on, and then went out again, but the back up battery for our PC blew up (I don't know exactly what you call it technically). This was THE INCIDENT that finally made a believer out of my hubby that I had something to do with the electrical experiences.  I was way past coincidence at this point. My hubby told me that I needed to tell someone about this so I could get help because now it was getting expensive!

I told Suzanne that I also had dreams where people had passed away in a horribly tragic experience or accident. The problem was that I would dream the event as it happened not before. It wasn't a premonition because I had no time before things happened to prepare or warn anyone.  For example, I dreamt the plane crash in Lexington, KY.  I dreamt I was in KY, and watched a plane drive off the runway into a horse farm and crash. There was fire, and I just knew that most likely everyone was dead, but everyone was approaching me wondering what had happened. I was just bombarded with anxiety. I jumped up from my sleep, and I told my hubby that a plane crashed at Bluegrass Airport in KY. I said that I thought everyone was dead. I was sure it had already happened. I felt like I was there!  Jim told me to go back to sleep because it was way before our alarm was going to go off, and we could talk about it in the morning. He said that I was probably worried because at the time we were living in RI, but we moved from KY, and we were planning a plane trip to KY very soon. He said it was probably just anxiety related to that upcoming trip. I had so much trouble falling back to sleep. It felt so real. What did all those people want from me? What if it hadn't happened yet, and I was the one that needed to warn someone? Who could I warn without getting accused of something? Wouldn't everyone wonder how I knew all this before it happened? Wouldn't they think I was involved somehow?

At about 9 a.m., Jim woke up and went straight to his laptop. A part of him had to see if what I dreamt was real or not. He was of course hoping it was just a dream. The front page of CNN's webpage online was: PLANE CRASHES WHEN LEAVING RUNWAY IN EARLY MORNING FLIGHT FROM BLUEGRASS AIRPORT IN LEXINGTON, KY; ALL FEARED DEAD!  OMG! I was right, and if my memory is correct, it happened around 5:30 a.m. just as I awoke suddenly from the horrible dream.

I also dreamt about my cousin's grandmother. She was diagnosed with esophageal cancer that had metastasized to the brain. She died very soon after, but before she died, she came to me in a dream. Actually, before she was diagnosed, I dreamt she had cancer, but I wasn't sure what kind it was; I only knew it wasn't a female type of cancer like breast, ovarian or uterine. I was actually thinking of bone cancer. I knew it was far along, so I was thinking it had spread to the lymph nodes and bone, but wasn't really getting the exact location. The next day, she was in the ER, and was diagnosed rather quickly with esophageal cancer that had spread all over. She didn't have long. Perhaps that is why it was so hard for me to get a good reading on where it was. Anyway, she came to me in a dream before passing, and she told me to tell her family that she was fine and not to worry. She wasn't in pain anymore. They could all let go knowing that. I called my cousin the following day after the dream, and I asked her as gently and calmly as possible if her grandma was still alive. She said yes. This stumped me because of the dream. At first I thought maybe it actually was just a dream. Then I explained to my cousin everything. She knew about my abilities, so it didn't shock her when I told her about the dream. She told me that the night before, her grandma had slipped into a coma, and has never come out of it. My theory is, and it is only a theory because only God knows the truth, that when she went into the coma, her soul left her body. She was already on the Other Side, but her body remained for the family to have a little more time to let go. My cousin agreed, and she informed her mother about what her grandma told me. They were all very happy to hear that she wasn't in pain anymore and that she was OK.

I also experienced some things similar, but there were no dreams that I recall from my memory. One night we were sleeping. I awoke. I told my Jim that the phone was gonna ring, and it was gonna be a very important call from my dad with very sad news. I said when it rings, just pass the phone over to me. Not a minute later, the phone rang, so Jim handed me the phone. I answered it. It was my dad, and he was crying. He said his brother passed away from an aortic aneurysm. Moments before the phone rang, I swore I could hear an angelic choir singing. I couldn't imagine where it could have been coming from at 3 a.m. It was heavenly! We backed up to I-75, lived in a single family home, had no TVs or radios on, and IT WAS 3A.M so there was no explanation for a church choir to be singing at that moment. Similarly, Jim's grandmother was in a coma, and family was visiting and awaiting her passing. I kept "feeling" that the passing was going to be at a certain hour on a certain day, but oddly, it didn't seem like it was going to be her. I felt like it was going to be someone else while we were in town, someone younger and unexpected who had been sick, but who no one was ready to see pass away. It was true, on the hour of the day I foresaw, a dear friend of the family's sister passed away. She was way too young. She had Rheumatoid Arthritis, Lupus, and other diseases, but what they think may have actually caused her untimely death was an aortic rupture from EDS--vascular type. She left two sons; one son has the same type of EDS--vascular type.  Then, I knew when Jim's grandma was ready, and we received the call just as I had "seen."

People passing away or ready to go to the Other Side, have been coming to me since I was a child. When I was 15, my grandfather on my dad's side passed away. He came to me to tell me he was fine. He was better on the other side. It was so sad when he was alive. He was 6 feet 7 inches tall with Alzheimer's and emphysema. He lived a rough life, and my 4 feet 11 inches of a grandmother took care of him all by herself until she couldn't physically do it anymore. My grandfather on my mom's side had a massive heart attack and was put on machines to keep him alive. He was pronounced brain dead so they took him off the machines. He lived nearly a week off the machines before he went to the Other Side. I stayed at the hospital the whole time he was there until I had to go back to nursing school. He was there during my entire spring break. Other relatives took turns, but I never left except to take a shower. I would come right back. I returned back to school, and I called every day to find out how he was. Then one day, I was studying, and I said to Jim that I had to call the hospital. I knew it had just happened. It was as though he sent me some kind of message without a word. I knew he had just passed away. When I called the room, my aunt answered. She told me he had just taken his last breath, and the nurse was getting the doctor to pronounce him. This was March 19, 1997, and I was 22 years old.

I also told Suzanne about how while living in St. Louis, they were searching for a missing person. I dreamt about a woman that was being pulled from a lake that was shaped like a horse shoe. In the dream, it was drastically cartoon-like. It didn't look like a real lake. It looked just like it was carved by hand into the ground to look just like a horse shoe and then filled with water.Three days later, I was watching the news, and began to feel my heart pound. They were showing a rescue team, police, CSI, and the medical examiner at a place called "Horse Shoe Lake." They found the body of a woman. It was the person that had been missing, I found out later. How did I know that? Should I have told someone? She must have been speaking to me from the Other Side. It was too late to save her, but her family had some kind of closure. A Robert Hansen was arrested for the serial murders of 15 women. Robert Hansen pled guilty on February18, 1984, to four counts of first-degree murder in the cases of Paula Golding, Joanna Messina, Sherry Morrow, and "Eklutna Annie."  One week later, on February 27, Superior Court Judge Ralph E. Moody sentenced Hansen to 461 years plus life, without chance of parole.  He was then remanded to Lewisburg Federal Penitentiary in Pennsylvania. By May 1984, investigators had found seven bodies at the grave sites Robert Hansen pointed out to them.   No other bodies were ever recovered. The summary went as follows:

On April 24, Sue Luna - Knik River.
On April 24, Malai Larsen - parking area   by old Knik bridge.
On April 25, DeLynn Frey - Horseshoe Lake.
On April 26, Teresa Watson - Kenai Peninsula.
On April 26, Angela Feddern - Figure Eight Lake.
On April 29, Tamara Pederson - one and a half miles from old Knik Bridge.
On May 9, Lisa Futrell's - south of old Knik Bridge.

On February 21, 2003, more than 20 years after her decomposed body was found, Alaska State Troopers asked for the public's help in identifying "Eklutna Annie."   In an effort to help solve her identity, state police released information regarding her clothing and jewelry.
Forensic reconstruction of Eklutna Annie
Forensic reconstruction of Eklutna Annie

According to the report, which was published by Kenai Peninsula News, an Alaska newspaper, the victim was a white brunette in her 20s.  When found, Annie was wearing knee-high, reddish-brown, high-heeled boots, jeans, a sleeveless knit top and a brown leather jacket.  Troopers were also hoping that someone might recognize her jewelry; a silver cuff bracelet with polished stones, possibly handmade.  Anyone with information should call investigator William Hughes at 907-269- 5058.  Email: william_hughes@dps.state.ak

The day that I decided to tell Suzanne EVERYTHING, we walked out of her office, and she introduced me to Beth. Beth was the energy worker that shared office space with her. She sat on the couch with me right then and there, and the first thing she noticed was that I wasn't wearing a watch. She noted that some people are more sensitive to magnetic energy and others to electrical energy. As  for myself, she believed I was sensitive somewhere in the middle to electro-magnetic energy. After talking with one another, we decided to start an energy group where we could learn from one another how to control our energy and direct it to help others and not deplete our own energy in the process. We began meeting a couple times a month--Beth was the instructor to three of us students. One student was studying theology and is now in Pennsylvania. Another student became a really close friend of mine. 
We learned a lot from Beth, but we also learned from each other, and ultimately we learned from ourselves and about ourselves. I also learned how to ground myself, which is a lot like appliances. By grounding myself, I don't blow things up anymore, and I haven't since the day Beth taught me how to do so. Beth passed away from lung cancer, and we were devastated! We were not only sad that we lost a wonderful teacher who taught us about energy and about life and living, but we also were upset and felt like we were abandoned by that one person who was our guide. We had lived our lives believing that something was wrong with us, that we had to hide our abilities and gifts from others. Beth helped us to AWAKEN our gifts, to not fear the opinions of others, to know that they were gifts from our Creator, and we shouldn't be ashamed of them. It has taken along time to get over the sadness of losing her and the feeling of abandonment. We felt as though our guide that was leading us finally, just up and left us. We were lost in a world of people unlike ourselves. But now we are realizing this is another lesson, another AWAKENING. We needed to experience some of our gifts and abilities and learn how to use them best on our own. I have gotten stronger in knowing myself, stronger in my abilities, and so much more sensitive being on my own. I have also realized that I am not alone. It is not just she and I with these abilities and gifts. The universe has opened up as we have opened our eyes, including our third eye, and AWAKENED our spirit. As the universe opened, like-minded and like-spirited people, as well as like-bodied people have been drawn to me. We haven't done anything differently but opened ourselves up and AWAKENED our spirit!

I have encountered people on the street telling me that I must not close myself up to the world, that I am a healer and a medical intuitive, and I must continue that path. Right after Beth passed away, my world just stopped, and I stopped searching for months for what to do next, and people picked up on it. Although I wasn't actively doing anything to AWAKEN my spirit, it was beginning to "wake up" on its own. I attended a paranormal and metaphysical conference in downtown Atlanta over the summer, and met many like-spirited and like-minded people. It was an amazing experience, and the atmosphere was full of energy. A man at the conference asked if he could check my energy. He placed one hand over my hand and one under my hand. He looked at me as though he was shocked! He turned to the woman next to him. She looked shocked as well. He told me he had never seen anyone with energy like mine except that of a Shaman. He said I must continue my path. Again, someone told me this. He said my energy is the energy that I do not even have to focus on. All I have to do is walk into a room and point, and I can direct healing energy that easily. I was amazed! Could it be true? Could my energy be that powerful? Should I even question it? He told me do not concentrate so much on it. He said that my level of consciousness is a level that others cannot comprehend. I probably don't even understand the level I'm at just yet, but I will. It is all part of my plan. And since I am doing God's work, it is all good energy, and a level of consciousness that is reaching that of Christ's Consciousness!

The other night when I looked up at the harvest moon, I meditated calmly and quietly on what God has called me to do. There is a reason for everything. And although I believe it somewhat has to do with God's calling, I have stated before that it also has to do with our blueprints that we work on before we are born. I believe that is our decision what we put on those plans. Now because God gives us free will, we can always stray from our own plans. I believe that I wanted to have a difficult life of pain to educate others and for my own self to learn from living a life of pain as well. I wouldn't have it any other way. Many tell me that I must want a pain free life, and yes it would be nice to not have pain, but I do believe this is what I chose, and for a good reason. I have learned a life of peace, of compassion, the importance of empathy and sympathy, as well as patience! I had a free call scheduled with a medical intuitive for advice to see where I should go from here. The phone call was scheduled 6 months ago, and in the mean time I made the decision to do free remote energy healing for those in my online social networks, and began a blog talk radio show about pain and healing. I offer callers free energy healing sessions on the radio show as well. I hope to someday have my own practice with a healing center to help people in person with energy healing. My dear friend who used to go to energy group with me, loves my ideas for the future. She has joined my effort with a suggestion of possibly opening a healing center for women with energy healing and yoga classes with a gift shop that carries metaphysical books and other items. Yes, I do believe she's on to something!
So I will repeat words that I said earlier:  The universe has opened up as we have opened our eyes, including our third eye, and AWAKENED our spirit. As the universe opened, like-minded and like-spirited people, as well as like-bodied people have been drawn to me. We haven't done anything differently but opened ourselves up and AWAKENED our spirit!

1 comment:

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